A few weeks ago I was horrified to read in the newspaper about two twelve year old girls who lured their friend into the woods after a sleepover and tried to stab her to death. Afterwards, one of them told police she had no remorse. “I guess it may have been wrong,” she said. The other girl said that when she heard the victim’s screams, “The bad part of me wanted her to die. The good part of me wanted her to live.”
Twelve year old girls? Trying to kill their friend? And all because of a fictional character they followed on the Internet.
The perverse ludicrousness of the story seared my brain with incredulity. How could girls as young as this fall into such evil? How could their minds be so warped and depraved?
The answer came as quickly as the question. Because they don’t know God. Because they have probably not been taught what is right and what is wrong.
If their families don’t go to church . . .
If schools are forbidden to talk about God . . .
If it’s unlawful to post the 10 Commandments on the wall of a courthouse or the walls of a school . . .
How do they learn what is right and what is wrong?
As adults, I think many of us just assume children will grow up knowing that murder is wrong. That is a basic moral code, right? But if there is a vacuum in their religious education and they spend most of the time on the Internet, juxtaposed with a couple of hours in front of the TV and a weekly outing to the movies, where are they learning their values?
George Washington Was Right
More and more I think we are seeing that George Washington was right:
“Let us with caution indulge the supposition that morality can be maintained without religion. Reason and experience both forbid us to expect that national morality can prevail in exclusion of religious principle.” George Washington.
In a world where a majority of children are growing up without any Christian education, our own children become more vulnerable as well. And as we go through our own struggles, and particularly if crisis strikes, we are often unaware of the enormous battle being waged for their souls.
However, if we allow God to draw our hearts nearer to Him in the midst of crisis, we may actually develop a heightened sensitivity to our children’s needs.
This happened to Faith when her husband left and asked for divorce. As the insecurities of change threatened her middle-school sons, she searched for a way to connect with them and encourage them to look to God for strength. Together, they began listening to and discussing CDs of The Kingdom Series by Chuck Black, which brings the Bible to life through the glory of battling knights in a medieval setting and is sometimes described as a Pilgrims Progress for the Xbox generation. Many evenings, as the boys hunkered down on the bed with her, she answered the hard questions and talked to them about what it meant to follow God into the future. Other times she spent one-on-one time with each of them to take their spiritual and emotional temperatures. Through honest conversations and spiritual encouragement, she not only helped them cope with the domestic heartache rattling their world but instilled God’s Word into her boys to prepare them for the challenges they faced in a public school environment.
Engage With Our Children
In a world where many forces vie for our children’s minds, hearts, and loyalties, it’s more important than ever that we engage with our youngsters. They need to feel our support and love as we take time to discuss important issues with them so they can clarify their own values and beliefs and articulate them with genuineness and intelligence to their friends. We need to pray with them for wisdom and discernment in an academic world that is frequently hostile to the Christian faith.
Yes, there is cause for concern. But as we look to God for wisdom and direction, there is also a reason for hope. Our very own children may indeed be the hope that is found in unexpected places. As we tackle our problems and encourage our children with God’s Word to see His provision, we teach them to be strong in their faith, that God is the conqueror, and that He will help us–and them– to overcome.
This 4th of July I pray that the words “In God We Trust” will be more than a motto we see on a dollar bill, or even a creed we share with our countrymen, but that it will be a belief that is emblazoned on our hearts so that regardless of what happens in our world or our country, we as Christians can continue to hold firm and say with conviction “In God We Trust.”
“In my view, the Christian religion is the most important and one of the first things in which all children, under a free government ought to be instructed … No truth is more evident to my mind than that the Christian religion must be the basis of any government intended to secure the rights and privileges of a free people.” Noah Webster, Preface Noah Webster Dictionary, 1828
More George Washington quotes at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/g/george_washington.html#ozeWbhea38uP1cxu.99
*To readers who don’t live in the U.S.: Please bear with me this week as I recognize our national holiday by focusing on issues of national interest. Next week I will feature another powerful author interview on Avoiding 12 Relationship Mistakes.
Doing this and seeing a change in our family that brings tears to my eyes. This was, I always thought, my husband’s strength, not mine. I am using a devotional book with them that is tying Jesus to the entire Bible and it’s awesome. My 6 year old listens to the stories and is able to answer the sometimes hard application questions. My 8 year old asks for prayer now and tells me exactly how he wants to be prayed for. I am learning right along with them and it is drawing us close together. I’m excited to look for the Kingdom Series. My boys will love it I’m sure! Thanks Linda 🙂
How wonderful that you’re able to engage with your children like this. It’s sometimes hard to imagine the way God works in our lives when things are going counter to how we think they should be going. Would you mind sharing the devotional you are using? Perhaps other readers would like to know so they could use it too.
Absolutely! Long Story Short by Marty Machowski
Thanks, Chris.
Ha! Long Story Short by Marty Machowski just went free on kindle amazon!! I’d send a link but not sure how. 😉
Thanks, Chris. Here it is if anyone wants to try it out : http://www.amazon.com/Long-Story-Short-Ten-Minute-Devotions-ebook/dp/B00F5KX76O/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1404411050&sr=1-1&keywords=long+story+short
My youngest was 17 when my husband left. I continued to go to church and not talk bad of him, because he has past demons that haunt him. But she and her 3 older siblings all no longer go to church, though I worked hard to keep faith an important part of their life. How can they believe when their own father went against his vows, left me and now divorced me as of March, for no reason given other than living apart for more than one year. And now letting the house go into foreclosure because of the debt he mainly created. I tried to hold out hope for the deep ties I thought we had created in our marriage through our service to the church and our example to others with our family.
Oh, HopeforLove, I know the pain of seeing your children suffer only compounds your personal pain from your husband’s leaving. It is so terribly hard!
I’m often dumbfounded by how the leaving spouse and parent can insist that their actions do not hurt their children. But I think it’s because they really don’t want to see it so they can justify their actions. But I don’t think I’ve ever seen a situation like this where the children were not hurt, especially when they see a parent who has professed Christ, suddenly abandon their family and reject the very beliefs they have taught to their children.
BUT . . . again, I do believe the promise of Romans 8:28 that “All things work together for good to those who love God and are called according to His purpose.” I know that God can work all these painful circumstances together for His and our ultimate good. I’ve seen children walk away from God for awhile because of the hypocrisy they see in their parents’ situation, but later come back to a deeper walk with God after God has healed their wounds. Each of us has our own road to walk, and God can use this situation in your children’s lives to grow an even deeper walk with Him where the obstacles they will overcome help them to become stronger in both their lives and their testimony.
Cover them with with prayer and let them see your own trust in God as you walk out your faith before them with truth and love.
I am trying to be an example of faith and hope that maybe, out of all this, they will learn and build a better marriage early on in their own lives and not go through the heartbreak I am going through.
I continue to seek out guidance and explore more ways to get myself connected to my church and my faith, and I seek out the strength of those whose faith is greater than mine. I still read your book over and over, and am trying to keep believing that I must give him time. I really do not know the depth of his hurts, but I do know I was faithful, and maybe he will turn back to me. I don’t believe he has stopped loving me, but just can’t face me with his past right now.