Finding True Love on Valentine’s Day

February 2, 2022 by 2 Comments

FEBRUARY IS HERE. And so are thoughts about Valentine’s Day. Hearts and flowers decorate the stores. Heart-shaped boxes of chocolates greet us on our way in to shop for groceries. It’s the month of love.

It’s a happy time for some people. But for others, the coming of Valentine’s Day just magnifies the pain tugging at their hearts.  Focusing on “love” is the last thing they want to do.A purple heart says "love me" and pink flowers are nearby

If this is you, and your heart sinks with melancholy when you think about Valentine’s Day, turn your heart in another direction, where true love is encased in a reality beyond what you have ever known or will ever know in this world. If you do, the sorrow and disillusionment of Valentine’s Day may actually open your eyes to the most loving relationship you have ever known. Yes, you might find hope in an unexpected place.

If we look up instead of inward, if we chase away those fears of rejection by earthly lovers and instead embrace the true lover of our souls, we will rise above the failures and pain and begin to understand the true nature of love.

The author of love stands ready to enfold us in His arms. He is always ready to give and receive our love. And he will never leave us. His is the pure, unconditional love we long for, but will never find on this earth among fallen humankind.

Who else would pursue us through eternity to give us life by subjecting Himself to death?  Who else is so intent on giving us joy that He would take intense sorrow and pain upon Himself so we can enter into the wonder of an eternity with Him?  And our eternity can begin now in a loving relationship with Him as we trust Him and lean on Him and take His word into our hearts.

Paul pleads for us to understand this in his book to the Ephesians when he says:  “I pray that Christ will be more and more at home in your hearts, living within you as you trust in him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God’s marvelous love; and may you be able to feel and understand, as all God’s children should, how long, how wide, how deep, and how high his love really is; and to experience this love for yourselves, though it is so great that you will never see the end of it or fully know or understand it. And so at last you will be filled up with God himself.”  (Ephesians 3:17-19 Living Bible)

Cling now to these words. Fill your minds up with this incredible truth. Open your heart to Paul’s prayer and accept God’s wondrous love that is meant for YOU.

“How long, how wide, how deep, and how high his love really is!”  How amazing!  How incomprehensible. Can you wrap your minds around it?  This Valentine’s Day meditate on these words.  Let God’s love embrace you. As I’ve heard my grandchildren say, It may be “the best Valentine’s Day ever.”

But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. (Romans 5:8)

If your heart is hurting and Valentine’s Day just seems like one more painful thing to take in, the heart-warming words of my book, Broken Heart on Hold, may bring you the peace and loving God-connection you’re looking for.

Share
Filed Under: Depression, Desire, disappointment, Feeling unworthy, Hope, Lonliness, Love, Pain, Uncategorized, Valentine's Day Tagged With: , , , , , , ,

When Dreams Aren’t Coming True

September 26, 2019 by Leave a Comment

One morning I sat on my screen porch praying and seeking God.  Discouragement hung heavy on my heart. One of my life dreams just didn’t seem to be coming true. Writing had been my passion since the sixth grade. I wrote for the school newspaper in junior and senior high. I majored in creative writing in college.  My desire to be a writer stuck with me continuously through life, even as various detours caused that dream to drop by the wayside again and again. Some of those detours were God driven, and I willingly followed His lead, using my passion for writing in each of those endeavors. Gradually, local opportunities surfaced.

When the bottom dropped out of my life through a heart-breaking three-year separation from my husband, God began to prepare my heart to go deeper into Himself and into the plans He had for me.

In the year 2000 after my husband and I reconciled, the doors opened for my writing. I published my first article in HomeLife, then Focus on the Family. I became a contributing writer for Tapestry, a Walk Thru the Bible devotional for women.  More significantly, through the heartache I had suffered during our separation, God planted seeds of healing and grace that resulted in my writing Broken Heart on Hold. Four years later, I received my first book contract for it. Through the trauma of heartache, my dreams were finally coming true.

But like so many of us I was satisfied for only a little while.  Eventually, I wanted more. The book proposals and drafts I wrote for two more books went nowhere. My agent faithfully persevered with me through one rejection after another. The rejections were kind: “She writes well,” “Great concept.” Etc.  But they were rejections, and I didn’t understand why God was not allowing me to publish other books that would lift up His name.

A New Revelation

That day on my screen porch as I prayed and spilled out my heart to God in disappointment, I asked God why, why had I not received the blessing I was seeking. As I prayed, a scripture came to mind  that had been hooked into a tab at the top of my bathroom mirror for years.

“If you abide in me and my words abide in you, you can ask what you want and it will be given to you”   (John 15:7).

I had glanced at the scripture often. Abiding.  Abiding with God. Yes, that was something I desired and tried to do.

“I’ve done that, Lord,” I said aloud. “I have abided with you. Through all those painful times, I abided with you.  I pray all the time.  You know that, Lord.”

In the stillness of my heart God answered me. “But that’s only a part of the promise, Linda.  Yes, you’ve abided in me. But what’s the last part? And my words abide in you.”  Have my words abided in you?”

My mind immediately skipped back to a Beth Moore Bible Study I had recently completed and a story she had told in her Breaking Free video where she told about a woman to whom God abruptly and forcefully spoke an admonition into her heart and mind saying, “Get in my Word!”

Those words resonated with me now too. God’s voice came through loud and clear in the recesses of my mind. I suddenly saw what was lacking: it was not only my knowledge of scripture, but my time reading His Word.  I was not consistent with daily Bible reading.  Oh, I had read through the New Testament a few times, but only once had I read all the way through the Old Testament. And I knew they are oh so connected!

So it came as a shock to me when I realized that although I had gazed upon that scripture on my mirror for years, I had missed an important part of it.

Abiding

Acting upon my new revelation, I got in God’s Word. I began spending time in the scriptures each day. I meditated on the verses I read.  I enrolled in Bible Study Fellowship, a wonderful, in depth study that digs down into God’s Word and plants His truths deep into the hearts of participants.  Although God’s Word had been alive to me before, through time in more intensive Bible Study and meditation, the scriptures themselves began to live in my heart and mind so I could begin to pull them up when I needed God’s wisdom.

As time continued to unfold, I saw that God was teaching me an important lesson about our dreams coming true. When we expect God to grant our desires, but our dreams aren’t coming true,  we may be missing something God wants to show us. In fact, He may have plans for us that are bigger than ours. His purposes for us may reach higher than our own limited vision allows, and we are not yet ready to receive them. That is what I saw happen to me and my writing.

This year, when I published my third book, Fighting for Your Marriage while Separated, I saw God’s hand in it at every level. A few weeks ago, when it won the Golden Scroll Non-fiction Book of the Year Award from AWSA, an association of distinguished Christian authors, I praised God that His ways are perfect and so much better than mine. He knew the plans He had for me. He knew the book He wanted me to write and publish that could bless people’s lives, families, and marriages in important and transformational ways. His plans were bigger than mine, and as I grasped hold of what God wanted to teach me, He allowed my dreams to come true in ways that surpassed my expectations.

He has plans for you too. If your dreams aren’t coming true, you may not be able to see what God is doing right now, but perhaps you too need to hunker down in His Word and let it come alive in your heart so you can see His bigger purposes unfold in your life.

What dreams do you have that aren’t coming true? What do you feel God saying to you about this right now? I love to see your comments.

If you are struggling through a difficult time in your marriage, please check out my new book, Fighting for Your Marriage while Separated

Share
Filed Under: BOOKS, Desire, disappointment, Expectations, Goals and Resolutions, God's Word, Prayer, Trusting God, Trying to understand, unanswered prayers, Uncategorized Tagged With: , , , , ,

God’s Timing Amidst His Promises

May 29, 2019 by 1 Comment

At some point early in my painful marital separation, I felt God telling me that my husband and I would one day be baptized together. I don’t remember exactly when or how God put this in my mind, but it was one of the things that helped me hold on through the ups and downs of those difficult three years. Obviously, I realized that if this were to happen, it would mean my husband and I would someday reconcile our marriage. I also felt God telling me that my husband was to initiate it. I was to say nothing.

It was a beautiful picture I held in my heart as a way that my husband and I might one day be reconciled by renewing our faith together and also renewing our marriage commitment. I only told one of my friends exactly what God had shown me. But I always envisioned some very dramatic setting in which this would take place. We would be reconciled, then my husband would look at me starry-eyed and suggest we get baptized together. It would happen in the first few months after we got back together; we’d invite our friends and family; and we would make it a wonderful celebration of our marriage as well as our new life in Christ.

But after we actually did get back together, my husband Marv did not mention getting baptized. A couple of times after hearing baptism mentioned in a sermon, I asked him what he thought about what the pastor had said. He either didn’t have much to say about it at all or he didn’t see that it particularly applied to him. Time passed and nothing happened.

About nine years after we reconciled, one of our pastors preached a sermon about baptism. During the message, my heart burned within me. When the service ended, Marv turned to me and said, “I think you and I should get baptized.” My heart soared.  After eleven years of waiting, the promise was coming true.

A couple of weeks later, with absolutely no pomp and circumstance, Marv and I were baptized together. We signed up only a few days prior and told a few friends and family the night before. The one person who showed up with this last-minute invitation was – you guessed it – the friend I had specifically told about my promise from God. We were able to share our testimony with those present, most of whom we didn’t know, and it was a very personal, beautiful time of renewal for both of us. Having my friend Mary there as a witness to both God’s promise and fulfillment was especially meaningful.

It was probably eleven years from the time I first felt God whisper that promise into my heart until I actually saw the fulfillment of that promise.  And when it came, it looked so different than what I imagined. Was God slow?  Did I hear the message wrong?

We as Christians celebrate Christ as Messiah, our savior who brings salvation and hope to the world. But He as Messiah was not what the Hebrew people expected. They pictured their Messiah to be born in majesty and splendor. They expected him to come with an army to rule this earthly world. They had heard God’s promise, but they expected it’s fulfillment to look very different from what actually transpired.  And to this day, many people have missed seeing the fulfillment of the very promise they long to see take place.

Many of you continue on a difficult journey in your marriage, and while you may have felt God stirring hope in your heart at one time, the promise you’d hoped to see fulfilled is still far from view. Is God slow in answering?

God’s purposes are beyond our own, His thoughts are higher than ours. He has a plan that draws all things together, that brings healing to hearts beyond our own, that reaches down to touch us in the deep places of our soul, which can be so resistant to his voice. God holds all things together. When we look to him and trust him, we will see his promises unfold in our lives…maybe not WHEN we’d like them to…maybe not HOW we’d like them, but they will be perfect in God’s holy sight and will fit into his eternal plan.

As you open your heart in humility to hear God’s voice, I pray His presence will buoy up your heart with love, peace and a new sense of promise.

Read more of my story and how marriages can be reconciled in Fighting for Your Marriage while Separated.

Share
Filed Under: Desire, Expectations, Hope, Marital separation, Reconciliation, Trusting God, Trying to understand, Where is God? Tagged With: , , , ,

MESSY GARDENS – MESSY LIVES

March 27, 2019 by 2 Comments

Feeling the need for a concentrated time of prayer one morning, I stepped onto the patio with Bible in hand and cozied myself into one of the lawn chairs. I felt unsettled.   Things were not going as I thought they should, and I felt my heart tugging in several directions.  The needs in my life seemed numerous and I longed for direction, but my prayers seemed to hang suspended without answers. How was my world fitting together?

As I reflected on my circumstances, I gazed about the wilderness of my yard.  It was wild and messy and reminded me of a scene from The Shack, a book I’d been reading in which the protagonist Mackenzie encounters God and works through some of the ironies of his faith.  In this particular scene, when Mackenzie walks into a garden with a character named Sarayu, who represents the Holy Spirit, Sarayu tells him about the significance of the garden’s messiness. “This garden is your soul,” Sarayu says to Mackenzie.  “This mess is you!”  

The messy garden was his soul?

Wow!

I related.  I felt that I was a mess right then—scrambled and unsure of myself.  Maybe this garden –my own yard—was a picture of my soul, pretty in spots, but unkempt and messy in others.  Certain bushes flowered; others waited for another season to bloom.  Fern and philodendron meandered about, overgrown and out of control.  Everywhere weeds, desperately needing extraction, wound through beds, spoiling what would otherwise be attractive

The words of Sarayu continued swirling through my head as he further unveiled to Mackenzie why they had spent the morning together digging in the garden, which was desperately confusing and messy and “a chaos of color,” but beautiful at the same time.

“Together you and I, we have been working with a purpose in your heart. And it is wild and beautiful and perfectly in process.  To you it seems like a mess, but I see a perfect pattern emerging and growing and alive.”

The memory of Sarayu’s words hit me with meaning. Was this similar to how I was?  My messy garden and my messy life, both in process?  Both wild and beautiful at the same time?  Could the messiness in my life actually be part of the beauty?

A Message Through the Ages

As I read my Bible that day and contemplated the truth I saw in my garden as it related to the scene from The Shack, I realized that this had been one of God’s messages throughout the ages.  When we allow God to work in our lives, He uses our strengths and weaknesses, pain and joy, failures and successes for His good purpose.  We are infinitely complex, and the Holy Spirit joyfully cultivates the beauty and messiness of our lives, scrambling it all together to form a perfect design that pulsates with new life as it emerges from the confusion of its surroundings.   Even the Bible surprises us with countless stories of people who followed God but had imperfect lives.

Take a look at Peter, Jesus’ disciple. He must have bitterly bemoaned his messy and capricious heart as he wept bitter tears after denying Jesus not once but three times and at the very moment his Lord was being condemned to death by the Pharisees.  How his heart must have withered when Jesus looked at him after that third denial.  The conviction that must have burned within his heart!  The self-doubt! The self-condemnation!  Peter had walked beside Jesus for three years, loved him, vowed never to leave him, but in Jesus’ greatest hour of need, he denied that he even knew him.

But Peter—like us—was in process.  He’d come from being a rough-speaking fisherman to a follower of Jesus who one moment was adamant in his unfailing love and the next embarrassed and afraid to be discovered as one of his followers.  After Jesus rose from the dead, Jesus plied Peter with questions to test his heart, then challenged him to take the keys of God’s kingdom to a lost world. Peter led the charge.  He became a leader among the apostles, suffering many times for his steadfast loyalty and courageous preaching about Jesus as the way to salvation.  God took his messy heart and turned him into the rock, the foundation for a growing church of believers.

Like Peter, I’m in process.  You’re in process.  God looks deep within us and sees the good as well as the messy and troublesome parts that with a little prodding can bloom into something beautiful—something He saw there at the beginning of time when He first thought to create us.  He has a future and a plan for us that will grow into reality when we allow Him to be the Gardener of our hearts.

“He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. . . . It is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose.” Phil: 1:6 & 2:13

© Linda Rooks 2019

Share
Filed Under: Desire, disappointment, Feeling unworthy, mistakes, New Directions, Time with God, Trying to understand, unanswered prayers, Uncategorized, Where is God? Tagged With: , , , , ,

A Bigger Plan for Paul

July 26, 2016 by 2 Comments

arched doorwayWhen Paul, the apostle, was imprisoned in Rome I can imagine the disappointment and confusion he must have felt. Why would God let him languish in prison when the world needed to hear the good news about Jesus?

Paul’s desire was to travel around the known world, evangelizing everyone within the sound of his voice, spreading the good news of Jesus Christ.  But instead, he was sent to prison, where very few were within the sound of his voice, and all he could do was . . .

. . . write letters!

His ambition, his dream, his goal, and I’m sure his prayer was to travel to different cities in the known world so He could bring people to Christ. These were good goals. They were meant to honor and glorify God. And yet God prevented him from doing so.

Why was this?

Because God had an even bigger plan for Paul.  God wanted him to write letters to the churches, whose influence and power would extend far beyond the times in which he lived. The epistles he wrote would become the foundation for the scripture of the New Testament so later generations would reap the benefit of his wisdom and anointing.  If Paul had had his way, only one generation would have benefited from his insights and revelations. His words would have been short-lived, only reaching the ears of whomever he encountered physically.

Instead, God had a bigger plan for you and me to hear his words, so they could produce eternal, lasting fruit for centuries to come.  When God denied Paul the answer to his prayer, God was thinking of us—you and me. Although Paul would never have been able to comprehend it, God’s plan was way larger than Paul’s. His plan was perfect.

God knew what He was doing. He did then, and He does now. He always does.

We nod our heads today and look back to see this clearly in the life of Paul, but can we see it in our own lives as well?  When things don’t go the way we’d like, when our prayers aren’t answered in the way that seems logical for us, how do we react?  Do we still see God at work in our lives? Do we still acknowledge that God is a big God with plans that are above our own? Or do we fuss and complain that our prayers have gone unanswered?

I have to confess that I am writing this for myself. I am most guilty of second-guessing God.  When I write something that glorifies God, but it doesn’t get published, I ask, “Why God?”  But I fail to realize that the God I want to glorify is a God beyond my limited understanding. His ways are higher than mine. His purposes are beyond anything I can presently comprehend.

And so I need to surrender.  I need to be still and let God be God. I need to rest in His arms a little longer and let Him guide me onto the perfect path where my desires are subservient to His glory. Where His love and grace stir my heart and fuel my passion into walking wherever He leads. Maybe down known paths, maybe unknown, but perfect because they lead to His throne and His glory to fulfill His purpose.

Perhaps you, like me, need to surrender your desires, your ambitions, and your dreams to God so He can fulfill the bigger plans He has for your life, plans which are far beyond our own imaginations, plans that bring blessing to us and others in ways that only a creative God can bring about, plans that have glorious and eternal results for His glory and His kingdom.

If you want to see His bigger plans unfold in your life, please pray with me as I lift these things to God:

Everything I have is yours, God. You know how my small offerings can fit into your bigger plan, and I give them to you. Let my prayers become a sweet smelling aroma to you as you transform my desires into manna for your perfect purposes and your everlasting glory. Amen.

 

“I know the plans I have for you . . .plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord.  “As the heavens are higher than the earth,     so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” Isaiah 55: 8-9

Share
Filed Under: Desire, disappointment, Doubt, God's goodness, Surrendering to God, Trusting God, Trying to understand, unanswered prayers, Where is God? Tagged With: , , , ,

The Spiritually Mismatched Marriage–An Interview with Lynn Donovan

June 4, 2014 by Leave a Comment

WinningHim Without WordsThis week I’m happy to introduce you to Lynn Donovan, author of Winning Him Without Words, as well as two other related books, 10 Keys to Thriving in Your Spiritually Mismatched Marriage, and Not Alone, Trusting God To Help You Raise Godly Kids in a Spiritually Mismatched Home.

If you have a spouse who is not a Christian, Lynn has a message that will help you on this walk.  Lynn is an author and speaker who has appeared on 700 Club Interactive, Focus on the Family, Dr. James Dobson’s FamilyTalk and FamilyLife Today.

But I will let Lynn introduce herself and tell you more about her story.  Here’s Lynn.

Lynn Donovan

Lynn:  Hello everyone! I’m joining your community this week to share a bit about my God-sized story. I’m so thankful that Linda has asked me to be a part of your home.

My friends, my story is about a Prodigal child – me (Luke 15:11-31). I fled my childhood Sunday school days in my twenties. I left my loving Father for all the promises the world said were mine. I met my husband in these dark years and we fell in love. We were married and for the first three years everything was fine. But the world’s lure proved shallow, unkind and untrue. I heard my faithful Father calling in the distance and He wooed me.

I went running home into the arms of my Papa and was thrilled to once again have a relationship with God. But, I ran home dragging my unbelieving spouse behind me kicking and screaming all the way. To say that my husband was unhappy about this new “Man” in my life, was a serious understatement.

I am unequally yoked.

There are many women such as me who sit alone week after week in church. There are women who are married to men who say they believe and yet they are also like me, living in a spiritually mismatched marriage. We are committed to our marriage covenant and wish to honor our Lord no matter how we arrived in our spiritually mismatched marriage.

My journey has been a crazy adventure, filled with loneliness at times, as my husband and I view life through two different world views. On this journey I’ve had to face fears over my children’s salvation, as well as having to live with the disappointment of attending church alone, wanting to be a “normal” couple, and the most difficult—the rejection of my faith by my best friend on earth.

But don’t feel sad for me….  Because I serve the risen Savior and through His love and power, I have discovered that the unequally yoked can truly thrive while living with an unbeliever. We can grow in our faith, love and respect for our spouse, raise our children to a vibrant faith, and walk in the Presence of the Most High.

Lynn’s 22 Year Adventure

Linda:  I’m looking forward to hearing what else you learned on this 22 year adventure, Lynn.  But tell me, what does your husband think about this ministry?

Lynn: By the grace of God my husband is fully supportive of my ministry and he encourages me to help others who are also spiritually mismatched. I call that a “Way cool God thing.”

Linda:  Lynn, you mentioned to me that you discovered a powerful scripture that changed everything about your marriage.

Lynn: Yes, I did, it is: (Jesus) answered, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.'” —Luke 10:27

Linda: How did this make a difference in your marriage?

Lynn: When you love God, His Son and the Spirit with all of your heart, soul, mind and strength you are transformed. Your mind is transformed and then disappointment and bitterness no longer has influence in your life. You discover an unending joy bubbles out of you, flowing onto your husband and your children. This kind of love transforms a heart, heals a body, restores a marriage, and leads little ones to faith.

I had to remove my eyes and expectations from my human husband and place all of my hopes upon Christ. When I did this our marriage moved into THRIVING. My husband found freedom to discover God in his own way without my manipulation and I found my expectations were replaced by God explanations. I was transformed by the love of God.

It’s a miracle! Woo Hoo!!!!

And Linda one of my favorite truths I share is this:

A man can ignore a nagging wife, but he can’t ignore the truth of a transformed life.

 Linda:  I like that.  But tell me what do you think is the biggest struggle for those who are Spiritually Mismatched?

Lynn:  Across the board, men and women, who are married to pre-believers (we like to call them pre-believers) struggle through a season of loneliness. In our book, Winning Him Without Words, the entire first chapter addresses this season. What I want to tell everyone who is unequally yoked is to press forward during this season. This is the training ground for growing your faith into a vibrant, strong and intimate love relationship with the Father.

You can overcome this. You can attend church alone and receive great blessing from your church family. You will discover the truth of Hebrews 13:5 God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”

The Children

Linda:  Many times I hear from people who are concerned as to how an unequally yoked marriage will affect the children.  What do you say to that?  And have you found specific encouragement in the Bible to help you on this walk?

Lynn:  Yes, there is actually a passage in the Bible that was written just for us. God knew there would be unbelievers married to believers and that’s why 1 Corinthians 7:12-14 exists. Let’s read it from the Message translation as it is rich in meaning and implication. This verse specifically gives me great comfort as a mother raising children in a spiritually mismatched home.

For the rest of you who are in mixed marriages—Christian married to non-Christian—we have no explicit command from the Master. So this is what you must do. If you are a man with a wife who is not a believer but who still wants to live with you, hold on to her. If you are a woman with a husband who is not a believer but he wants to live with you, hold on to him. The unbelieving husband shares to an extent in the holiness of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is likewise touched by the holiness of her husband. Otherwise, your children would be left out; as it is, they also are included in the spiritual purposes of God. —1 Corinthians 7:12-14

I’m learning that when we as believers love Jesus and walk in the power and presence of the Holy Spirit, we impact our environment. And, in fact, we bring God’s will and purposes into our lives and into the lives of our children. The living presence of God within us becomes so powerful that, Paul tells us through the believing spouse every member in the home is sanctified. The living presence of God is so contagious, so powerful, that it creates an umbrella of safety over anyone who comes into that environment.

Linda: So are you saying that it is simply your faith, walked out in the home, which ministers to your children?  Even though your husband has a different worldview, your faith is enough to point the children to God?

Lynn:  Yes, we as believers are uniquely positioned to release the purposes, the love and the very power of God into our children’s lives. Our kids are then included in God’s plans for their lives. They are sanctified—set apart as holy unto the Lord. They belong to the Lord. When we grasp this truth, praying with faith through the Holy Spirit for our kids, we need not live in fear for their salvation. Our love, our example, our Jesus is always enough. I believe this promise for my children’s future and for their eternity.

Wow…… just WOW!  Today if I can talk personally to your readers, I’d like to say, “Let the truth of this passage roar in your spirit. Your faith covers your home. This was a paradigm shift in my thinking and changed how I approached spiritual warfare for my kids and husband. My holiness covers them. They are under the love umbrella of God because an ordinary wife lives with Jesus in her heart and home. Of course, this isn’t a guarantee of their salvation but it is a great encouragement and it keeps me from living in constant fear for their eternity.

 Linda: Thank you, Lynn.  I know this is a serious battle for a number of people reading this interview, and we need a real prayer covering for our homes and our children. Would you like to close us with a prayer?

Lynn: Lord, let this passage bring freedom to every woman and man here today. Let the truth and the power that comes with your living and active Word permeate every place in his or her heart and home. I ask that the Holy Spirit would prove the truth of how the prayers of a righteous mama (or papa) availeth much. In Jesus name. Amen.

Linda, thank you for allowing me to share the hope that I have. Hope is a person, Jesus Christ.

I love you and count it a privilege to be here with your community.

 Linda: This has been a blessing, Lynn. Please tell us where people can find out more about your ministry and your books.

Lynn:  You can visit me online at www.spirituallyunequalmarriage.com

 

Share
Filed Under: BOOKS, Children, Conflict, Desire, God's Word, How to win, Lonliness, Marriage problems, Surrendering to God, Trusting God, Uncategorized, Worry Tagged With: , , , , , , ,

Interview with Kathy Collard Miller, Author of Partly Cloudy with Scattered Worries: Finding Peace in All Kinds of Weather

May 14, 2014 by 8 Comments

Partly Cloudy With Scattered Worries - Kathy Collard MillerWhen I scheduled this interview with Kathy Collard Miller for early May, I didn’t connect the appropriateness of her book title with our Florida weather.  But as I look out the window at the gathering clouds and intermittent rainstorms, I find the timing of my interview about her book, Partly Cloudy with Scattered Worries: Finding Peace in All Kinds of Weather to be extremely fitting.

I believe Kathy’s topic about worry and anxiety will resonate with many of us.  In the midst of life’s storms, how do we keep from worrying?  Speaker and author Kathy Collard Miller has an answer for us. She has published 49 books and has carried her message of hope, faith, and encouragement into eight countries throughout the world and thirty U.S. states.

I feel honored that she is sharing with us today.

Linda:  Kathy, what is really wrong with worry? What is the biggest problem that worry causes for us?

Kathy:  The answer to both those questions is that worry steals our ability to acknowledge God as the God of our lives. I have no trouble calling worry sin because we are disobeying God’s command to “Be anxious about nothing…” (Philippians 4:6). We have a big problem when we fight God’s control of our lives. We’re on our own and we try to control and manipulate people and circumstances to get our needs met. And it’s so subtle. We may not even realize we’re worrying—we call it other words like concerned, mulling, thinking or planning, but we’re not seeking God.

Anxiety is currently the number one emotional problem of American people. Panic anxiety is the number one mental-health problem for women in the United States, and in men is only second to substance abuse. Worry causes relationship problems, physical illness, loss of faith, and stress. No wonder! We’re trying to play God.

Linda:  I’m sure we can all admit that we worry at times. But I’m curious. How did you happen to write a book about worry?

God was working and tranforming me to trust Him more and I wanted to share what I had learned. My desire is to help readers trust God more by being convinced of His greatness, sovereignty, power, love, and involvement. We can say we trust God but then we give in to anxiety, people-pleasing, controlling others, regrets, fear, and trying to provide for ourselves when God says to wait on Him. Our responses actually reveal that we don’t trust God as much as we think we do.

For instance, if a woman is wondering whether her husband still loves her, or is worried that he’s being unfaithful, she may try to manipulate or control her husband. She may react in anger out of anxiety or withdraw her heart because she is taking his behavior personally. Her eyes are on making her husband meet her needs rather than trusting God to meet them. But Philippians 4:19 says God will provide all our true needs. Worry won’t make our spouse respond; it’ll only cause us to react in ways that may push him away more.

I was once in that very situation and my worry made me bitter and needy. It only caused my husband Larry to want to work more so he could be away from my nagging. But when I committed to trusting God to be all I needed, even if Larry never changed, I became more peaceful. Then Larry wanted to be around me. Now we’ve been married almost 44 years.

Linda:  Tell us a little about the concept that began to transform your thinking about worry.

Kathy: I heard this concept at a conference: “If I’m worried, think of the worst possible thing that can happen and then think of reasons why it wouldn’t be so bad after all.” The speaker quoted Romans 8:28: And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose (NASB). I realized my worry indicated I didn’t think God had the power to bring good out of bad and I worried that something bad would happen. But quoting that concept and verse began to give me a different perspective. It helped me relax and allow God to be in control.

 Linda:  Why do you think people worry?

Kathy:  Of course, there are many reasons but here are a few. We may have experienced some hurtful things in childhood and blamed God. So our hearts are fearful of turning control over to Him. We may think that worry gives us power in another person’s life. I remember worrying when my teenage son had to fly across country by himself to a Christian golf camp. I worried he would miss his connecting flight until God whispered, “You’re worried because you want him to need you. Let him need Me.” Oh, how revealing. I could then release that worry and let God show Himself strong. Additionally, people worry because they really do think worry does some good. One woman told me, “Well, of course, worry works; after all, what I worry about doesn’t happen.” I’m sure she was joking (I think!), but in our hearts, we can think it does some good. Unfortunately, worry only makes us tense and then we react in ways we regret. Plus, God isn’t honored.

Linda:  Many of those reading this blog are going through serious storms in life. The worries they have are based in substantial life traumas that have already disrupted their lives. They worry about the future, about what will happen with their children, whether there is hope for their marriages, etc.  What do you have to say to them?

Kathy: I am sad to think of those going through hard times. I can relate. After being married seven years, I hated my husband and took out my anger on our two-year-old little girl to the point that I abused her. I worried that I would actually kill her in one of my rages. I almost took my life to prevent that from happening. But God intervened and as I turned my life over to him little by little, I saw how He wanted to use my struggle for His glory and my good. God healed our marriage and the relationship with my daughter. He gave me a ministry of sharing my story and writing about it. Then that blossomed into the ministry I have today. And my daughter is a happy adult who calls me her best friend.

I understand life seems impossible, but God is still God and He wants to help us. And worry doesn’t accomplish a single positive or helpful thing. It only motivates us to respond in hurtful and damaging ways. Worry is impotent but God is powerful. There is always hope with trusting God.

 Linda:  Tell us a little more about your book.  What are you trying to accomplish and how is it formatted?

My book helps people, primarily Christian women, to trust God more and thus worry less. It is filled with stories from my own life and the lives of others who learned how to do that very thing, along with biblical principles and practical instruction. I’ve also included Discussion Questions that a group or an individual can use. Plus, every chapter highlights a woman from the Bible who either struggled with worry or one who overcame her worry. Every chapter ends with a “Letter From God” which speaks to the reader about what she learned in the chapter.

 Linda:  Are you available for speaking, especially on this topic of overcoming worry?

Oh yes, I love to speak on lots of topics, including overcoming worry. I especially love speaking at women’s retreats because I can have extended contact with the women. I can be reached at Kathyspeak (at) aol (dot) com.

 Linda: Where can people find out more about Partly Cloudy with Scattered Worries?

Kathy:  It is available on Amazon for either Kindle reading or print:
http://amzn.to/18SUUHM

Or to get a little preview, you can view the book trailer at http://bit.ly/1czUhKh

My website/blog is www.KathyCollardMiller.blogspot.com


Share
Filed Under: BOOKS, Depression, Desire, Doubt, Fear, Feeling unworthy, How to win, Interviews, Marriage problems, New Directions, Prayer, Surrendering to God, Trusting God, unanswered prayers, Uncategorized, Worry Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , ,

Treasures at our feet

April 17, 2014 by 5 Comments

Do We See Them or Are We Caught in the Frenzy?

Blue Easter egg - biggerCOLORED EGGS OF EVERY HUE  lay scattered over the green expanse of lawn before us. Our daughters stood behind a stretch of rope along with hundreds of other children from town, waiting for the start of the event.  This was the local Easter egg hunt, and all the children were excited in anticipation of finding as many goodies as they could.

When the signal was given and the rope dropped, the children stampeded into the center of the field—all except for one—our six-year-old daughter Julie. While hordes of children scrambled over the field looking for eggs, Julie took a single step and picked up an Easter egg lying just inside the ropes, directly in front of her. Then she continued into the field, picking up eggs as she went—ones passed up by the other children as they had hurried together towards the treasures they spied beyond.

My husband and I chuckled, amused and proud at the wisdom of our little girl.

Today as I think back on that day and picture my daughter standing alone at the edge of the field to take advantage of the treasures at her feet, it makes me think.

How many times am I like that throng of children racing into the center of the field, looking for something to enrich my life, while missing the very special blessings God has put right before me in that moment? Have I really seen—and appreciated—the beauty of flowers blooming and birds singing, the richness of a special relationship in my life, or the provision of daily sustenance needed for that day?  Have I seen the beauty of what lies right in front of me?

Yesterday, as I tried to unscramble a colossal mess of conflicting schedules I had created for myself because of too much busyness, I heard that still small voice in my heart whispering from the Word.  “Be still and know that I am God.”  (Psalm 46:10) As those words of truth settled over me, I realized that if I brought my confusion to God and put it into His hands He would sort it out. After all, He’s omnipotent. He knows what’s happening. And, in fact, He knew about the mess I’d made before I found out about it.

And so I sat down with His Word and allowed Him to put His peace into my heart. And as my mind stopped racing in “fix it” mode, I could see that His plans were not my own.  His agenda was different.  I let some things go, and everything fell into place.

Sometimes when we’re in a frenzy to figure things out and solve our problems, God asks us to just ”Be still and know that I am God.”  (Psalm 46:10) When our hearts and minds are quiet before Him, we’re better able to listen for His voice and hear when He wants to point us in a new direction.  When we wait on Him, our eyes can refocus so they can see with more clarity the path He’s laying out before us.

Who knows?  His provision might be right in front of us. But we haven’t been able to see it because we’re so intent on trying to reach the “Easter eggs” in the distance.

During this holy Easter week, quiet your mind and allow yourself to fully see the God who loves you so much that He was willing to walk the dark path of death so we can be with Him in life.  Take some time out from your busy schedule. Stop wrestling with the worries that hold you hostage.  Be still and know that He is God.

Share
Filed Under: Desire, Easter, Goals and Resolutions, God's Word, stress, Time with God, Uncategorized Tagged With: , , , ,
Return to top of page · Copyright © 2024 Linda Rooks All Rights Reserved · Return to Linda Rooks